Raising Standards

This past Saturday, I went to brunch with a few girlfriends.  During our casual conversation, one of them (who’s been married for 5 years) was “giving advice” to another (who’s single and desiring to be married).

In her advice, she told her that marriage was a business deal and should be treated as such by focusing on how much money he’s working with. My single friend nodded her head in agreement and the conversation continued.

Now, this wasn’t the first time I heard her say that marriage was a business deal; however, she said it enough times for me to think harder about it today.

When do we as women reach a point where we minimize marriage to a deal?  At what point do eliminate the blessing of loving another in order to prioritize personal gain? After all, isn’t that what a business deal is?

While I know that she had good intentions that afternoon, I have to disagree with her ideology.  It simply isn’t God’s original design for marriage.

Think about it: The first two chapters of Genesis discuss marriage. God cares about it so much that He put it in the beginning of His entire love story.  His relationship to Israel was compared to a marriage as well, and we know that Jesus is married to the church. Ultimately, God’s intent for marriage was to mirror His personal relationship with us.  There’s no monetary deal in that – only love and unity.

I believe that God awakened our interest for understanding relationship goals.  We as believers can raise the standards for a culture that believes everything opposite of His truths.  That doesn’t mean we’ll get it perfect every time, but it does mean we work towards God’s ways by pursuing His original intent above all else.

So, the next time you are forced to choose a standard for relationships and love, choose the one that God already laid out for you.  Then, encourage others in your world to do the same.

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Elana Cole is a writer, educator, and professional coach who is passionate about helping others in their personal journeys towards a more beautiful life. She is the author of "The Midnight Experience" and creator of Empowered Narrative, a blog about transforming the way you live and love.

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